On Being Lolita: More Questions

On Being Lolita: More Questions

I’ve been neglecting my poor blog~ These past few weeks I have been feeling a bit less fluffy than usual, so I haven’t been writing. I’m trying to get back on track, particularly because the coming of autumn brings such a nice season for wearing lolita and attending meetups.

Since starting up an account at Formspring and incorporating it onto my blog, I’ve been getting quite a few questions. I’ve already posted previously with a compilation of questions and answers, but I think now is as good a time as any to do so again. Please remember that these answers are my opinions. I’m just me–feel free to agree or disagree.

1. Do you wear lolita to work?
          Sometimes. Lolita outfits are not against my company’s dress code, and I don’t interact with clients. However, I don’t like wearing lolita fashion to work because it’s distracting to my coworkers; I want to be remembered for the work I do, not what I wear.

2. How did you come up with your blog name ‘Pink Mlik Tea’?
          I LOVE milk tea, and I like pink! Besides, some of my other choices were already taken! :3

3. Would you say you dress like your doll or that your doll dresses like you?
          Neither, actually! My doll (now dolls) has a lot of school uniforms and dresses in dark colours. Her one pink outfit has shorts, so I would NEVER wear it. I don’t dress her in lolita fashion. My “casual” clothes are jeans and t-shirts, something I won’t purchase for my doll.

4. You say you wear bloomers. Where did you buy them?
          I have a few pair that were made by a friend (bloomers are not difficult to make) and a few pair from Metamorphose–although, since I prefer the longer length, Meta uses the term “drawers.” Their “bloomers” are much shorter. Meta bloomers/drawers are quite expensive, but mine were part of lucky packs.

5. What challenges will a boy face coming to a Chicago lolita meetup? I would like to make friends, but am worried about acceptance of single males in the group. Could you offer honest and frank advice?
          The biggest challenge in being a male attending a meetup, particularly alone, is making it clear by your behavior and in conversation that you a) don’t think lolita fashion is a sexual fetish and b) aren’t attending in an attempt to hit on community members. The biggest barrier that a boy will face is suspicions about his intentions. Most of the girls are used to being mocked, propositioned, or any number of other extremely uncomfortable things when wearing the style.
          If you’re truly interested in the fashion and joining the community, you shouldn’t have to work very hard to “prove” yourself at all–it will be immediately evident.
          It helps to come dressed in your best attire and have a good attitude. Everyone is very friendly, but you’ll need to be friendly as well. Sometimes there are so many people in one place that it’s impossible to focus on every shy newcomer and coax them into conversation, and thus people can feel neglected or ignored. It’s best to avoid this from the start–introduce yourself and join in conversations. If “jumping right in” is overwhelming, try to talk to a few people one at a time during the event. And, most importantly, continue to attend! It’s hard to get to know people based on one impression.
          If you have any other questions I’ll do my best to answer them, as well.

6. I saw that you have Secret Shop Shoes. Do you think they fall large, small or are they just right?
          Secret Shop shoes are fairly true to size, and in my experience they run -just slightly- larger than the original shoes. (For example, my Secret Shop replicas are slightly larger than my Angelic Pretty tea party shoes.)

7. How do you know what kind of petticoat you need? A-line, fluffy, A-shape, it’s so confusing!
          The type of petticoat you need is determined by the fullness of the skirts you’re wearing. :3 “Fluffy” is usually the very full, traditional bell-shaped petticoat. A-line/A-shape/princess are less full–they give you a more trapezoidal shape (like an uppercase “A”–fluffy petticoats are more like an upside-down “U”). Circle skirts and full trapezoid skirts benefit from a fuller petticoat. If you try to put a full petticoat beneath a skirt with less yardage, it will be squashed and not fit properly.
          I usually determine which kind of pannier is required by following the line of the skirt on stock images or estimating the gathers at the waist. Looking at a stock image, if the skirt curves up and out from the waist, I’ll want a full petticoat. If the skirt slopes down from the waist, A-line will be better. Skirts that need full petticoats also tend to have more gathers at the waist, because there is more fabric.
          If you prefer a less-full silhouette, you can usually wear an A-line petticoat beneath just about anything without creating a look that is awkward.

8. Do you buy your lolita clothes in a shop (like Tokyo Rebel), online or secondhand?
          I buy most of my clothes secondhand, either from friends or online. I don’t live near a shop, and I’ve never been to Japan. I have made a few direct online purchases, but usually I look for good prices on lightly-used garments on Yahoo!Japan or egl_comm_sales.

9. Did you see that on Qcute they have almost exact replicas of Angelic Pretty‘s Wonder Cookie? What do you think of that?
          I don’t support replicas out of respect to the artists and designers of the original garments, particularly when artwork is involved.
          (I’m still trying to sort out my feelings about replica shoes. I don’t support that practice either, but I do own a pair that I love to wear–which is hypocritical.)

10. Where do you buy your lolita socks?
          I buy my socks from Angelic Pretty, BABY the Stars Shine Bright, and Metamorphose, sometimes directly from the companies, sometimes on egl_comm_sales, and sometimes from auctions on Yahoo!Japan.

11. Do you buy from AP’s English site or Japanese? In the case of Japanese: isn’t that hard?
          I usually buy from their Japanese site via shopping service. The English site avoids most fees, but the communication is not very good and the selection of items is worse.
          It’s not very hard to order from the Japanese site; I can read enough lolita fashion-specific Japanese (measurements, fabric type, etc.) since I’ve been interested in the style for several years. It’s even easier to see if something is in stock–I just try and add it to the cart and see if I get an error message. They won’t ship overseas from the Japanese website, though; a shopping service is necessary.

12. Do you know a good shopping service?
          I’ve heard good things about Japonica Market, but I’ve never used them.
          I like to use Crescent-Shop, because I like their system. However, they do not have a low fee structure.

I think there are even more questions, but those will have to be for another day~ I’m glad that there’s been some use of the “ask questions” feature, and I hope it’s been useful to someone.

Please remember–if you’d like me to get back to you instead of answering the question publicly, just include your email address in your question. I’ll send you an email instead~ ♥

On Being Lolita: Questions and Answers

On Being Lolita: Questions and Answers

A little while ago I signed up for FormSpring when I heard people talking about it. I never used it and had forgotten about it, but then it occurred to me to link it from the blog as a way to have a “drop-box” for questions without worrying about spam email. (I’m working on an “email me” option, just in case anyone would like to, but I want to keep myself from piles and piles of junk.) I liked that FormSpring allows people to ask questions anonymously, and I can delete or choose not to enter questions that are rude or insulting–they aren’t posted until I respond. (Thankfully that has not been a serious problem, but I try to be prepared.)

For a while there wasn’t much activity, but recently I’ve been receiving a few questions about lolita fashion. I decided to compile them here in the event that anyone else was curious.

Please note that I am not a magically all-seeing, all-knowing judgment-casting princess of the style. n_~ These answers are my opinions. Please feel free to disagree with me!

1. Would you dress lolita in school? Or is it perfectly ok to hang out with friends and dress lolita at home and with them?

Whether or not I would dress lolita in school depends on the class. I would certainly have worn it in high school if the opportunity had been there. I have worn it to university courses on occasion, but because I am enrolled in a school of business it is usually inappropriate. My professors and classmates could be potential business contacts, and I don’t want to alienate them by being known only as “the girl who dresses weird.”
          And it is absolutely positively okay to hang out with friends and wear lolita fashion at home or with friends! You might as well wear it while you enjoy it. ♥

2. Do you keep a number of how many lolita items you have? If so how many?

I don’t really count my lolita items, but I have quite a few! I’ve been wearing the fashion for several years, and I very rarely resell anything–plus my little sister loves to pass off clothing to me. But there’s definitely a lot!
          I have a picture of my closet here (which would give you an idea), but it’s not up-to-date.

3. How do you get your hair in those lovely curls/spins?

My hair is very curly, and it easily forms spirals with little coaxing. When my hair is wet I twist it in the direction I’d like the curl to turn, and occasionally repeat the procedure until my hair is dry. Sometimes I use a bit of gloss to help with fly-aways.
          I get asked this a lot, and I wish I could do a tutorial on it, but my method won’t really work for anyone with a different hair type.

4. Is it strange for a sweet Lolita to wear black?

Not at all! My little sister wears sweet lolita almost exclusively in black~ ♥ A print of cookies and candy is still cookies and candy whether it’s on a pink or black background–it really doesn’t look any more “gothic” that way.

5. What did you dress like before you discovered lolita?

Boring! Even now, when I don’t wear lolita fashion my clothes are duuuuuuuull. XD My typical outfit involves a tshirt or camisole under a sweater with jeans. I wear sweaters even in the summer, although then over casual sundresses instead of jeans + shirt.

6. Have you seen the movie Kamikaze Girls?

Yes, I have seen it. (I also own it.) :3 It’s a cute movie!

7. Do you wear bloomers beneath your Lolita clothes?

Yes; I think bloomers are very important. I don’t want to accidentally flash my undergarments at friends or strangers!

8. How do you sit with a petticoat? Do you sit on it?

Yes, you sit on it. It’s like wearing a very cushioned or thick skirt.

9. How do you clean your Lolita clothes?

I dry-clean my blouses, delicate cutsews, jumperskirts, one-pieces, skirts, and coat. Even if they could be handwashed, I trust my dry-cleaner (they are very careful) more than myself. They also do a much better job ironing than I ever could.
          I machine-wash bloomers, petticoats, socks, cardigans, and some cutsews. However, I hang my socks, cardigans, and cutsews up to dry. I only run my bloomers and petticoats through the dryer.

10. Did you promote your blog? How?

My promotion is very minimal–I just write for fun, so if no-one reads it that’s a-okay. I’ll never try to make money off of it, and I don’t need “fame.”
          My blog is linked on my LiveJournal, and linked as my website on any account elsewhere (Flickr, Poupee Girl, Den of Angels, Twitter, WeHeartIt, and Formspring). I also have a feed so that updates are posted on my Twitter account.
          I think I actually get a lot of traffic from other lolita-related blogs. They often have lists of the blogs they read or updates on those blogs; I think that’s where most of my visitors come from.
          I hope that was helpful!

11. How can you make sure your bloomers don’t peek out from underneath your skirt?

The easiest way is to make sure your skirt is longer than your bloomers~
          If your bloomers -are- longer than your skirt, you’ll want to position the elastic higher up on your legs. This scrunches up the legs of the bloomers to make them functionally shorter in length.
          Although bloomers peeking from underneath a skirt is not really a problem or tragedy, especially if the lace or finished edge is particularly pretty.

If you have a question, feel free to drop one off, anonymous or otherwise! If you don’t want me to answer it publicly, include your email address as part of your question and I’ll email you~ ♥ Questions don’t have to be related to lolita fashion–I’ll answer any question that isn’t obscene or rude. ★