On Being Lolita: More Questions

On Being Lolita: More Questions

I’ve been neglecting my poor blog~ These past few weeks I have been feeling a bit less fluffy than usual, so I haven’t been writing. I’m trying to get back on track, particularly because the coming of autumn brings such a nice season for wearing lolita and attending meetups.

Since starting up an account at Formspring and incorporating it onto my blog, I’ve been getting quite a few questions. I’ve already posted previously with a compilation of questions and answers, but I think now is as good a time as any to do so again. Please remember that these answers are my opinions. I’m just me–feel free to agree or disagree.

1. Do you wear lolita to work?
          Sometimes. Lolita outfits are not against my company’s dress code, and I don’t interact with clients. However, I don’t like wearing lolita fashion to work because it’s distracting to my coworkers; I want to be remembered for the work I do, not what I wear.

2. How did you come up with your blog name ‘Pink Mlik Tea’?
          I LOVE milk tea, and I like pink! Besides, some of my other choices were already taken! :3

3. Would you say you dress like your doll or that your doll dresses like you?
          Neither, actually! My doll (now dolls) has a lot of school uniforms and dresses in dark colours. Her one pink outfit has shorts, so I would NEVER wear it. I don’t dress her in lolita fashion. My “casual” clothes are jeans and t-shirts, something I won’t purchase for my doll.

4. You say you wear bloomers. Where did you buy them?
          I have a few pair that were made by a friend (bloomers are not difficult to make) and a few pair from Metamorphose–although, since I prefer the longer length, Meta uses the term “drawers.” Their “bloomers” are much shorter. Meta bloomers/drawers are quite expensive, but mine were part of lucky packs.

5. What challenges will a boy face coming to a Chicago lolita meetup? I would like to make friends, but am worried about acceptance of single males in the group. Could you offer honest and frank advice?
          The biggest challenge in being a male attending a meetup, particularly alone, is making it clear by your behavior and in conversation that you a) don’t think lolita fashion is a sexual fetish and b) aren’t attending in an attempt to hit on community members. The biggest barrier that a boy will face is suspicions about his intentions. Most of the girls are used to being mocked, propositioned, or any number of other extremely uncomfortable things when wearing the style.
          If you’re truly interested in the fashion and joining the community, you shouldn’t have to work very hard to “prove” yourself at all–it will be immediately evident.
          It helps to come dressed in your best attire and have a good attitude. Everyone is very friendly, but you’ll need to be friendly as well. Sometimes there are so many people in one place that it’s impossible to focus on every shy newcomer and coax them into conversation, and thus people can feel neglected or ignored. It’s best to avoid this from the start–introduce yourself and join in conversations. If “jumping right in” is overwhelming, try to talk to a few people one at a time during the event. And, most importantly, continue to attend! It’s hard to get to know people based on one impression.
          If you have any other questions I’ll do my best to answer them, as well.

6. I saw that you have Secret Shop Shoes. Do you think they fall large, small or are they just right?
          Secret Shop shoes are fairly true to size, and in my experience they run -just slightly- larger than the original shoes. (For example, my Secret Shop replicas are slightly larger than my Angelic Pretty tea party shoes.)

7. How do you know what kind of petticoat you need? A-line, fluffy, A-shape, it’s so confusing!
          The type of petticoat you need is determined by the fullness of the skirts you’re wearing. :3 “Fluffy” is usually the very full, traditional bell-shaped petticoat. A-line/A-shape/princess are less full–they give you a more trapezoidal shape (like an uppercase “A”–fluffy petticoats are more like an upside-down “U”). Circle skirts and full trapezoid skirts benefit from a fuller petticoat. If you try to put a full petticoat beneath a skirt with less yardage, it will be squashed and not fit properly.
          I usually determine which kind of pannier is required by following the line of the skirt on stock images or estimating the gathers at the waist. Looking at a stock image, if the skirt curves up and out from the waist, I’ll want a full petticoat. If the skirt slopes down from the waist, A-line will be better. Skirts that need full petticoats also tend to have more gathers at the waist, because there is more fabric.
          If you prefer a less-full silhouette, you can usually wear an A-line petticoat beneath just about anything without creating a look that is awkward.

8. Do you buy your lolita clothes in a shop (like Tokyo Rebel), online or secondhand?
          I buy most of my clothes secondhand, either from friends or online. I don’t live near a shop, and I’ve never been to Japan. I have made a few direct online purchases, but usually I look for good prices on lightly-used garments on Yahoo!Japan or egl_comm_sales.

9. Did you see that on Qcute they have almost exact replicas of Angelic Pretty‘s Wonder Cookie? What do you think of that?
          I don’t support replicas out of respect to the artists and designers of the original garments, particularly when artwork is involved.
          (I’m still trying to sort out my feelings about replica shoes. I don’t support that practice either, but I do own a pair that I love to wear–which is hypocritical.)

10. Where do you buy your lolita socks?
          I buy my socks from Angelic Pretty, BABY the Stars Shine Bright, and Metamorphose, sometimes directly from the companies, sometimes on egl_comm_sales, and sometimes from auctions on Yahoo!Japan.

11. Do you buy from AP’s English site or Japanese? In the case of Japanese: isn’t that hard?
          I usually buy from their Japanese site via shopping service. The English site avoids most fees, but the communication is not very good and the selection of items is worse.
          It’s not very hard to order from the Japanese site; I can read enough lolita fashion-specific Japanese (measurements, fabric type, etc.) since I’ve been interested in the style for several years. It’s even easier to see if something is in stock–I just try and add it to the cart and see if I get an error message. They won’t ship overseas from the Japanese website, though; a shopping service is necessary.

12. Do you know a good shopping service?
          I’ve heard good things about Japonica Market, but I’ve never used them.
          I like to use Crescent-Shop, because I like their system. However, they do not have a low fee structure.

I think there are even more questions, but those will have to be for another day~ I’m glad that there’s been some use of the “ask questions” feature, and I hope it’s been useful to someone.

Please remember–if you’d like me to get back to you instead of answering the question publicly, just include your email address in your question. I’ll send you an email instead~ ♥

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